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    Tuesday, October 23, 2007

    California reminiscent of Hell mouth

    Here's a round-up of some information links concerning the SoCal fires currently tearing through the area like Sherman.

    Most of it was taken directly from []

    Google maps of inflicted areas

    And another one

    San Diego Fire Blog

    Charity Links and info

    Red Cross "Safe and Well" list

    Monday, October 22, 2007

    The New[ish] office

    This is the most recent configuration of the office. Note the ever distracting TV that both informs my work and keeps it from getting done.

    Remember Kids...

    ...steam is not your friend.

    Thursday, October 18, 2007

    Something Rotten

    My friend Alan, the one in the photo, has a new YA book out today called SOMETHING ROTTEN. You should all buy a copy even if you don't read. He's a poor destitute living in rural North Carolina. He needs shoes, and of course someone to show him how to tie them. He also has a wife and a daughter who need someone to show him how to tie his shoes. He gets a penny for every case of books sold, so dig deep and give a copy to all of your friends for the Holidays.


    "Denmark, Tennessee stinks. Bad. The smell hits Horatio Wilkes the moment he pulls into town to visit his best friend, Hamilton Prince. And it's not just the paper plant and the polluted Copenhagen River that's stinking up Denmark: Hamilton's father has been poisoned and the killer is still at large.

    Why? Because nobody believes Rex Prince was murdered. Nobody except Horatio and Hamilton. Now they need to find the killer before someone else dies, but it won't be easy. It seems like everyone's a suspect. Hamilton's hot, tree-hugging ex-girlfriend Olivia Mendelsohn is determined to clean up the river-and the Prince family that's been polluting it for decades. Hamilton's mom, Trudy Prince, just married her husband's brother, Claude, and signed over half of the plant and profits. And then there's Ford N. Branff, Trudy's old flame, who's waging a hostile takeover of Elsinore Paper. Motive, means, opportunity-they all have them. But who among them has committed murder most foul? If high school junior Horatio Wilkes can just get past the smell, he might get to the bottom of all this."

    OK, so he isn't destitute, but he could be if this book doesn't sell. He just built half a house.

    Wednesday, October 17, 2007

    Bid Penis

    OK, favorite sentence in a spam for the day. I'm afraid it's NSFW, but it is being quoted, so really it wasn't like you went looking for frighteningly accurate anatomical words.

    "watch her jaws drop when you roll out your bid penis"

    Now I can only assume that the "bid penis" is the penis used solely for negotiations and deal making and not actually the one used for closing said transaction. I'm also curious to know if the "bid penis" is demarcated with a number so that multiple bidders may participate in the auction. However, the use of the phrase "roll out" does show promise as well as inspire confidence. Confidence one will need when dealing with a woman possessing multiple jaws.

    Saturday, October 13, 2007

    The Darjeeling Limited

    With The Darjeeling Limited, Wes Anderson has created a film that is his richest visually, simplest story wise and unfortunately his least affecting. Utilizing the inherent visual grandeur of India as the backdrop, Anderson's story of alienated brothers reconnecting in an effort to move past the loss of their father is at times both charming and whimsical, but seldom emotionally accessible. Truth be told, I reacted quite differently to the accompanying short film, which can be downloaded for free from itunes, which sets up the back-story of one of the brothers. In The Hotel Chevalier, Jason Schwartzman and Natalie Portman give off the quirky hurt vibes of Anderson at his best. After watching it I started to think that what I'd like to see from Anderson at some point is a film composed of these small vignettes, related or not by characters, possibly constructed to give a feel or tone of a place, be it a city or just a building, such as the hotel.

    Schwartzman, Wilson and Brody all give good offbeat performances, but none of them are given moments to excel, with the exception of a moment when they attempt to save three Indian boys from an overturned river crossing raft. On the other hand, Angelica Houston's short cameo is quite revealing and I believe it is completely because of her presence and performance that we come to understand the three brothers more fully, but ultimately too late. There is a superfluous cameo by Bill Murray that does nothing but make you want to see more of him and wonder why you don't. The two major native rolls played by Amara Karan and Waris Ahluwalia are in many ways the most enjoyable to watch.

    Don't mistake my issues with The Darjeeling Limited as a statement that I do not think the film worth seeing, because I do. Like The Life Aquatic, it is a film that I will need to revisit before I can truly form a solid opinion of it. His last two films, Darjeeling included, have felt like albums from a favorite band that have digressed somehow from what is expected and need more time to be accepted. There is a possibility I'll feel the same way upon subsequent viewings, but something tells me that I'll get more involved the second time around.

    There are few American filmmakers whose movies elicit an instant need in me to see them. In his own right, and in my personal estimation, Anderson shares company with the Cohen Brothers, Alexander Paine, Spike Jones, The Polish Brothers, and eventually Sophia Coppola and Miranda July (I'm sure there are more, these are mine) as the contemporary bearers of the American auteur in film.

    Saturday, October 06, 2007

    Clean Shaven

    I finally shaved my head again. It has made me very happy. I had hair down to my collar and it was starting to be a pain. I liked the way it looked in the morning, but by afternoon, having walked home it was a useless mass. Simplify.

    Thursday, October 04, 2007


    What I think is worth watching this season, in alphabetical order. Also what I watched this summer and think is worth a look if you get a chance. All in all, there aren't too many new shows I'm watching, unless I think of another one later.

    New Shows:

    Californication (Almost over for the season)
    Pushing Daisies

    Returning Shows:

    30 Rock
    Boston Legal
    Brothers and Sisters
    My Name Is Earl
    Stargate Atlantis
    The Office

    Looking forward to the return of:

    Battlestar Galactica
    Dr. Who (UK)
    Torchwood (UK)

    Summer shows I enjoyed:

    Big Love
    Burn Notice
    Jekyll (UK)
    Mad Men
    Meadowlands (UK)

    Still haven't seen:

    Tell Me You Love Me

    Tuesday, October 02, 2007

    Pushing Daisies

    Here's the catch from the last post. The show they did do right in picking up and broadcasting was PUSHING DAISIES. It premieres tomorrow night (Wed) at 8:00 PM. Watch It. It is the most original, whimsical and heart-warning fantasy in years.

    Commercial Failure

    One of the saddest things about the new ABC show CAVEMEN is that it's even less enjoyable than the commercials upon which it's based. The commercials were only mildly amusing the first time the first one aired. They became stale fast. The second sad thing is that people think that a sitcom is a great way to talk about race relations in America, "Desmond Pffiefer" anyone?. The third is that they chose Neanderthals to be the stand in for African Americans and wonder what the hubbub is all about. If I think about it though I'd have to say the saddest thing about it is that combined with the equally dismal CARPOOLERS they take up an hour of air time on ABC. This is exactly the amount of time needed to air the pilot I worked on that, while not groundbreaking, was at least more enjoyable than these two flops. So, not only do they suck, but they stole a nice employment opportunity from me. So, in an effort to make myself more acceptable to the new rage here in THE GREAT MACHINE I present the following ideas.

    New show possibilities:

    The Animated fluffy Charmin Bears who seem to do nothing but shit with nice toilet paper. - One is red and one is blue, so it's a sitcom about the Red/Blue differences facing us all, and the shit it's put us in.

    The Geico lizard as an MI5 agent who is most successful in warm climate situations.

    Never mind, making commercials into shows is a really F^@&ing stupid idea.

    Monday, October 01, 2007


    Well, as seems to happen on a regular basis, for reasons you are all probably familiar with at this point, there is little to no internet waves I can currently access at home. So, it'll be quiet for a while. You should take a vacation from the blog, or simply wonder off never to return. Then again, just with me posting this the waves might magically return. Who knows. Seeing as how I'm not there at the moment though I can not say for sure.