BRAIN TWEETS

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    Wednesday, November 16, 2005

    Kitchen WMD

    Awe...isn't he sweet. Wait...what's that he's doing? He's eating the buds off of the plant next to the bird feeder. Well, I'm afraid that it has come to this. The squirrels continue to gnaw at the exterior of the house. My father wanted me to spray the places where they chew with insecticide, but he has done this once before and they have returned. So, I have taken it upon myself to construct a nasty liquid of my own, the act of which takes me back to when I was a small child mixing all the liquids I could find in the bathroom into a glass jar and wondering at it's might power. I have chose for my repellent elixir the following items, which I have added to water and heated to a rolling boil then let sit so as to extract of of their goodness: 10 chili pepins (crushed), 1 1/2 Tsp. crushed black pepper, cinnamon, 2 crushed garlic bulbs, tsp. cloves, tsp crushed mustard seeds, white vinegar, balsamic vinegar, and a pinch of salt. After the liquid had cooled somewhat I strained out all of the biggish bits since on the last try they clogged the sprayer, and poured the whole lot into a handy pressure canister. I pumped the canister vigorously then placed a ladder on the side of the house and sprayed where the little buggers had already decimated a healthy portion on the logs above the porch. Oh, and I've also chili peppined the sunflower seeds at the bottom of the bird feeder. As "W" once said after a satisfying day, "I think I could use a vacation." Currently the cabin smells heavily of black pepper, mustard, and vinegar in the most unappetizing way possible. If a picture is worth a thousand words then this post is 6298 words long, which officially makes it the longest post on this blog.

    4 comments:

    Anonymous said...

    I suspect the chili would work by itself...

    Fabricationist said...

    Yes, probably, but I needed to be sure.

    buckfelty said...

    sounds suspiciously like the rub for my wings recipe. do squirrels like wings? i think you should paint a "squirrels eating wings" painting that will become a cult classic akin to dogs playing poker.

    Fabricationist said...

    To be honest, I have a bit left over in the spray can and am thinking about applying it to my pork chop I'm thinking of grilling tonight. Of course I'll leave it in the can and just spray the chop while it cooks.